This is the latest all in one patch for 1942, from the details provided it sounds as if you used it.
http://team-simple.o...patch_v1.61.exe
Without the patch you should be able to direct connect to any server by adding the I.P.
You can even right click on the desktop shortcut click on properties and change them to launch directly to the server.
Example code
Win 7 CD C:\Program Files (x86)\EA GAMES\Battlefield 1942\BF1942.exe" +restart 1 +joinServer 64.120.56.204:14567
Win 7 Origin C:\Program Files (x86)\Origin Games\Battlefield 1942\BF1942.exe" +restart 1 +joinServer 64.120.56.204:14567
Win XP CD C:\Program Files\EA GAMES\Battlefield 1942\BF1942.exe" +restart 1 +joinServer 64.120.56.204:14567
Win XP Origin C:\Program Files\Origin Games\Battlefield 1942\BF1942.exe" +restart 1 +joinServer 64.120.56.204:14567
Try connecting directly to us to verify your installation would be my suggestion. If you cannot you will need to reinstall.
If you can , perhaps the path names being displayed assist you in patching.